Is life always going to be like this?

I hope not. I am so tired of life and I am only 24 years old. It is really quite sad. Year after year I make the same mistakes, go through the same depression, pick the same wrong friends, and end up in the wrong guys arms. This year I am going to try to do things differently: I am going to find my inner strength. I am going to be brutally honest with people. I am going to start taking better care of myself. I am going to stop protecting other's feelings at the expense of my own. I am going to end unhealthy relationships to make room for healthy ones. I am going to spend more time alone. I am going backpacking this summer, even if it is just me and Trek. I am taking a vacation. I am going to give God the control he should have had all along. I am going to get back into road racing. I am going to counseling and I am going to do it with an open mind. I am going to stop beating myself up over the past and put that energy into my future. I am going to monitor my own behavior. I am going to reach out BEFORE I slip into depression. I am going to get involved in a community whether it is church, an extracurricular activity or a sports/outdoors organization. So much for not making New Year's resolutions! If this year is not any better, I give up. Smilie for the Day: